I recently discovered some of my writing I had saved from High School and college, prompting a new series in my blog: Flashback Friday. Please enjoy this first edition.
Hopscotch
(Circa 1998)
I used to play hopscotch
Without a care in the world.
Everyone played
And we never knew their names.
It didn’t matter, it was fun just the same.
Times moved on
and so did we.
And soon it was just a faded memory.
Now I have friends
Acquaintances and close,
Mom and Dad.
They all stick around.
Temporarily, at most.
In the end,
My heart is broken and cold.
And here I stand,
Betrayed and alone.
Maybe I’ll go play hopscotch.
This was definitely from a significant period of life when the reality of changing relationships was sinking in. I was adjusting to my parents separation/divorce, young romances ending abruptly, and friendships changing as we gradually morphed into adults. I longed for the simplicity of childhood and lacked the maturity to accept that there was no way to return to it.
I still feel the pull toward the easier times in my youth but also recognize the growth, wisdom, and insight that comes from painful experiences. It’s hard to find that easy companionship as adults but it exists in our shared enthusiasm at concerts, knowing glances as we struggle with our children in the grocery store, and long hugs from friends that just get us, no explanation needed. These connections are bigger, deeper, because of the years of experience that molded them.
Hopscotch sure seems a lot easier most days but I wouldn’t trade away my years of living and growing to be back on that playground. I can smile because the happy memories happened and give a respectful nod to the struggling teenager I was back then. And be grateful that I’ve come to embrace periodic change and pain not as something to be avoided but a s part of truly living.
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