15 things

My eyes dart quickly around the space. I absent-mindedly  touch my face. I focus on my breathing but the breaths come and go and they are quick and shallow. My mind jumps from my work email, to my dentist appointment, to Christmas, to  the girl on the bus I made fun of in seventh grade, to the abrupt end to a phone call with a friend this week. My shoulders tense and my hands get clammy. 

I know I am experiencing the symptoms of anxiety. I know that no one around me knows this is happening to me. I can spend time rationalizing every worry that jumps through my mind but I know I can't keep up and I know they will keep jumping up provoking a physical reaction in me and begging for undue attention. 

This happens to me on a regular basis. I'm guessing this happens to a lot of people. I have a lot of strategies that I can use proactively to prevent the frequency and severity of these experiences. I don't consume caffeine as it triggers and magnifies my anxious feelings. I exercise regularly because it helps me work off the jittery feelings and clears my mind. I meditate regularly because it calms me and strengthens the connection between my mind and body. I pay attention to my breathing and remind myself that feelings come and go. 

But when the wave of irrational panic sets in, it's too late. I can go for a walk, I can breath thru it, I can talk to someone I trust. Sometimes these things work and sometimes they don't. And I don't know how long it will last or how bad it will get. 

I found this grounding exercise from Mommy Chat:

In the moment of experiencing anxiety, identify: 

5 things you can see

4 things you can touch

3 things you can hear

2 things you can smell

1 thing you can taste

I'm trying this and it's working. 

It's quick. It reconnects my mind and body. I can do this grounding exercise without drawing attention to what is happening to me - physically, mentally, or emotionally. 

Maybe you can relate to the feelings of anxiety or maybe you're one of the lucky ones. 

This can also work when you're stressed, when you're disoriented, or when you can't stay focused on the moment. 

And if it's not a strategy you need, it may be worth sharing with a friend. Anxiety can be silent but it can also be crippling.